1001 Penis Tales

So, perhaps as an antidote to all the Viagra spam I've been getting lately and all the penis enlargement offers* (along with some breast enlargement offers), today I get a spam email with this subject heading:

Now get soft for half the price!!

Really, this is the very worst product ever. And being half-off doesn't help one bit. Can they make it smaller, too? 'Cause that's sure to sell like lukewarm-cakes.

It's like some guys in the lab accidentally came up with this drug to, ahem, slacken the old wedding tackle (maybe they'd never heard of the miracle of whiskey-dick, although perhaps this new product is faster acting and has fewer side-effects) and just thought: "What the hell? I bet those boys in marketing can convince someone that they need this."

It turns out the email just wanted to sell me some knock-off software. Which is much less funny.


*A friend forward me an email the other day for a patch--a patch-to enlarge one's equipment. Ok, is it just me, or does ripping that thing off sound deeply unpleasant? But the ad copy was hilarious:

Your tiny penis looks like from the Disney World. With Penis Enlarge Patch it will look like from the Giant Planet.